Sunday, September 13, 2009

Suckday




As most of you know, Debe's delivery was not convenient for Silverton Hospital, and they've rescheduled for Tuesday. I do not know whence this woman's strength comes. I might have punched someone.

In any event, we have some time to get our domestic acts together before halting again to hold her up, and we need to bust some ass.

Today my house is pretty clean, so thankfully, my OCD default mode kicks in and I scope out new and exciting things to clean, to satisfy the itch that perpetually screams what a shit hole I live in.

Today, obscurity is driving me to:

-Eat something besides a protein shake (gasp!). An Odwalla smoothie. Did I ever mention I loathe the word smoothie?

-Rid my always-overflowing-despite-never-being-used cookware, and getting non-essential pieces ready for a swap.

-Try once again to hang our world map in such a way as to eliminate ripples. There can be no ripples here.

-Stock things which run low and make me feel like I live in a lean-to at the river, such as tp, napkins, paper towels, printer paper, etc.

-Scrub out garbage cans.

-Weed out a few more cds, hoping to reduce the stack by at least 700. Ugh the tedium!

-Store the many comforters I've cycled through in my manic attempt to finally make this glorious acquisition:


Gail asked if this bed is really small and the answer is that this summer we've been relegated to the use of my cell phone camera, which can distort, as Todd is a libra and has narrowed his camera possibilities to 45.

-Clean windows.

-Get medieval on the fixtures, it's such a great pick-me-up.

-I'm here alone this weekend so I'll stand guard with my sword to intimated the dust.

-Not even go outside where the dreaded corn is.

-Deal with recycling.

-General de-clutter.

-Once over in the bathrooms.

-Restore dignity to my side of the dual vanity. Todd's side has a toothbrush and mine has a MAC warehouse as well as all the equipment necessary to make sense out of my shit-ass hair, brushes, hella lotion, earrings galore, all Reilly's "essentials," a can of hairspray the size of a Volkswagen, and some other crap.

-Figure out where Quinn's Geek Convention is in Seattle so I can worry about driving there for the next two weeks.

--Call it a day and go see some of the only friends who do not have Guitar Hero. (But I love you Emily and Debe!) Kidding of course. See you after this shit is done.


HOW'S THIS?


-Get every dish done by bedtime.

-Get as many loads of clothing will fit into a day put away by bedtime.

-Wipe down all tables (dining, end, random, etc.)

-Remove lesser-used clutter from your counter.

-Put your smattering of fruit in one bowl. Seriously.

-Vacuum.

-Bleach a load of whites, like all towels, wash cloths, even if they're not dirty. Your mind will thank you, and more importantly, mine will. Hee hee.

-Dust fixtures, lamps, fans (!!!), and anything else that smirks, "Ha ha ha Cheyenne will never stop us!"

-Pick some shit up off the floor. Figurative shit that is. If you have literal shit on your floor I need to start a new blog.

Relax. If you even do part of this I'm impressed. If you do it all I will take you to coffee.

You guys are the best.

4 comments:

  1. Aw, I can't believe the hospital has rescheduled! I would have punched somebody too, also probably thrown cold coffee on some twat while I was at it (wouldn't want to be sued for burn injuries would we?) and demanded that somebody get their asses in gear!
    I commend her strength, I am in such pain for their family and I just want this to be over for them so the healing can begin. It must be torture.

    Cleaning for me today isn't here since (you know the drill) its the weekend so it's all work work work. *sigh* Next weekend however I have some time off since I have my babies home to celebrate Willow's birthday! YAY! So until I get some downtime, it's worktime until then. Grrrrr! xx

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  2. So my family deserted me last night and thank the baby Jesus Susannah was willing, yet again, to come protect me from the scary-ass corn lurking outside. I slept in the big bed, which I assumed would solve all the world's problems, as it is magical. Instead, I had horrible dreams and was apparently run over by a truck, so I awoke to my head in a vice and all my bones shattered. Nonetheless, I kicked some major ass. In 40 minutes, I:
    -Changed the sheets and figured out how to assemble the beautiful new bed set.
    -Stuffed the old bed set away and put it in storage.
    -Found coordinating throws for all the man shit (like guitars and amps) Todd keeps in there.
    -Ate.
    -Cleaned the entire kitchen, including obscure things like the espresso hopper, in anticipation of company later, ran dishwasher.
    -Swept/Swiffed.
    -Washed delicates, now onto normal clothes in abnormal quantities.
    -Swept back porch.
    -Washed down washer and dryer.
    -Swept laundry room.
    -Spiffed up living room.
    -Dusted.
    -Restocked hella shit so it doesn't look like we're running out of everything.
    -Changed all hand towels.
    -Got things ready for several (34698355) errands to pack in before greeting said company.
    -Emailed Gail.
    -Chatted with Gail.
    -Cleaned a detergent spill under the sink.
    -Scrubbed the kitchen sink, put stopper in dishwasher (gawgeous!).
    -Hung delicates, which I loathe.
    -Cleared off counter.

    Just need to wipe down guest bathroom if I could ever get my procrastinating ass in there to shower. Holy shit it's 12:47???

    Gotta go! Keep cleaning!

    (Why does running out of milk render all household culinary needs impossible? Even when no one in the house *drinks* milk? Wtf?)

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  3. OMG-I'm pretty sure I would have refused to leave. God that makes me angry for her!

    I am ashamed to admit that the whole school routine has completely screwed up my flow and I can't seem to get my disaster under control. I dunno. . .maybe I need to see about having my meds tweaked. WTF is my problem?!. . . . . .

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  4. I *still* can't believe Silverton Hospital. There are no words. Debe and family have been in my thoughts and will remain firmly planted there.

    I will come to rescue you from the scary-ass corn anytime! I only wish that your sleep had actually been GOOD! <3

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