Saturday, May 22, 2010

Small Sunday Salvations

First off, let me apologize for the minor melee that ensued in yesterday's comments, and any discomfort it may have caused. You see, some people are empty and BORED, and take every opportunity to raise my ire. Maybe after another year they will realize I don't give a shit about any of them, except when they hog what is supposed to be a forum supporting moms trying to get a handle on their homes.

I remain dedicated to assisting in this purpose, and will do my best to keep our collective focus on uniting as voyeurs in Mesina's affair with her Dyson, trying to change Dana's politics, and oh yeah, convincing you all that laundry is not the Big Bad Wolf. Really. It's a feral cat at times, but many of you are psyched out.

Today I was hoping to infuse a bit of inspiration, by showcasing some very practical tips (pics included!) for things that have eased my OCD tremendously. As you know, clean surfaces are my secret weapon against the imp of my mind that says my house is war-torn Bosnia even when I've scrubbed the skin off my fingers. Once the surfaces are clean, I can dust more easily, and have less clutter assaulting my eyes at every turn.

I cannot emphasize enough the revelation that is wire caddies. The ones from Fred Meyer are affordable and CLEAN looking, and you can see everything stored inside. To date, I use them to store all laundry supplies in the laundry cupboards, video game crap in a book case near the tv, miscellaneous things belonging to my precious children, whose streams of books, wallets, iPods, candy corn, pendants, and keys constantly emerge from their room and onto my COUNTER! (!!!) I also use these for socks, cds, computer games, Todd's weird nests, as a home for all the NWT things I keep around for unexpected gift giving, on the dryer for plates and casserole dishes that need to go back home with their owners, and under the bathroom sinks, for a) my hair shit, lint roller refills, razor cartridges, lotions, etc., b) Todd's seven gallon Lifesource shampoo, his razors, incense, and soap, and c) all of our medicine, which is always expired because we never get sick. Seriously. But bandages, gauze, that type of thing. I kind of think everything should be kept in these.

Behold the simple things in life that can save you space, bucks, and sanity:

An assortment of bins, caddies, closet organizers, white towels, and storage boxes for the scrapbooks I used to make. (See the caddies? See the caddie?)

Using Post-It Flags to get all your bills in order for the next day. Phone calls are my least favourite task, btw:

Um, these were the miracle find of 2010. I carry them EVERYWHERE. Some of your taco drops on your shirt while driving? PSSSSHHHHHHHHT! Notice a spot on your kid's skinny jeans that cost $3,007? PSSSSHHHHHHHT! Reaching for lip balm in your purse? You will always grab this first. Stock up!

These glorious little book shelves will save your life/sanity when clutter is your undoing. They're small but have deep shelves, they cost $20-$30 at Fred Meyer, and the best part, they fold into place, so no men required. I have these everywhere, and cannot express my love for them enough. Notice a stack of them in the master bedroom, stuffed to the gills? This was before we cleaned the closets, and now those shelves are perfection, have no fear:

I have long underestimated the power of flowers. A few stolen tulips, or anything your kids pick you, on a surface that will catch your eye often is sure to boost your spirits, even if your laundry is holding a scythe at your back:

Most of you are devout coffee drinkers, but there is some buzz for this sh-- I mean, this beverage. My motto? Whatever it takes!

Hopefully something here grabs you. I'm going to give thought to just the basics, and the motivation to tame them. I've got some music going here, and will do some research at friends' houses, to see what the main problem areas are and how to best them.

Have a great Sunday. LOST series finale here at 7:00pm, come one come all! I will have bath mats hanging everywhere, fyi.


  1. I love that you have flowers as a part of the little things that can help. I TOTALLY agree 100%. The best feeling to me ever, is to have a clean living room or dining room or kitchen with a vase of dandelions, tulips or whatever else the kids bring in! I LOVE flowers, preferably not store bought.

    I love that you said no men required. I also resent it, being the "we don't need men to assemble, build or do things" person I am. (How did I get so resentful!?!)

    I think it's great you have a cleaning blog. I have yet to meet a mother who doesn't somehow work to find a happy balance between messy/clean and indoor/outdoor, kid time/laundry time. It is a balance and I like that you have forum for cleaning. Things like wire bins, two hours per Saturday and acknowledging the evil coupons is great!

    The windows can still kiss my ass. And, it is your politics I am after. You know, most republican are so tightly wound, they are better cleaners than democrats. Liberal slackers! You are the exception. :-)

  2. First of all....
    Who the hell forgot to leave high school?! I still can't believe that as adult as we're supposed to be, people get off on stalking your blog and leaving shitty comments. Life advice for creepy stalker people: Get a life. It's not that hard.

    Secondly, OMG I have MISSED your blog so much! Now that life is getting back to a new normal, I'm cleaning this place as much as I can, even if it means cleaning with a baby strapped to me. Yes, I have been known to have a little me and Mr Dyson time while breastfeeding Jared in his baby carrier... cos I'm fuckin' badass like that. (Haters can suck it)

    Today I managed to speed do the dishes and wipe counters while Jared pretended he was gonna sleep and then cried half way through my job nearly done. I made him wait. Just call me evil, but that freaking kitchen needed to be finshed!

    I'm also doing my best NOT to look out into the backyard since we have a jungle situation going on out there. This isn't the first time (remember looooong ago me complaining?). But if those goddamn monkeys make it inside my house and trash the joint I am throwing bananas outside and locking Maurice out. I MEAN IT!

  3. Mes--I can't believe these hollow, transparent, festering assholes aren't embarrassed to look at each other. Seriously. I overestimated the whole lot of them. Not an ounce of honour or truth among them. They must be really proud.

    I have missed you on the blog! I was wondering how long you were going to milk this newborn thing--Jesus! That is sooo low!

    Sounds like you're back with a vengeance, as expected. A little three-way Dyson action, multi-tasking, oh yeah, you're back. Clean kitchens are where it's at.

    OMG don't look outside! Whatever do you do! Insurmountable jungle situations are not conducive to motivation inside. But, the humanitarian in me is compelled to extend an offer for Maurice to stay here should he find his ass outside, with naught but bananas. Just sayin.

    I'm glad you're getting back on a routine. Of course my 1/3rd son will cooperate in letting you get a hold on the house. Smooch him right now, and wipe something while do you.