Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Where For Art Thou, Wednesday?

As you can see, it's nearly nightfall and your fearless leader has only just dragged her ass to the computer to light a fire under you guys. But could someone light one under me first?

I have that certain complacency one gets when one has scrubbed her house to a sparkling shine, and slacks off the next day, so that the following day, the house is war-torn Bosnia.

What I have done though is:

-Made all beds.

-Rotated two loads of laundry.

-Did the dishes, cleaned sink, counters, cleared counter top.

-Ate, took meds.

-Looked around to see what, if anything, I can achieve while asleep.

-Contemplated how many horse tranquilizers it will take to get me to sleep.

-Wiped down computer are.

-Placed my nice table runner, recently washed, on the table, cursed the wrinkles, and realized I am an ass and owe Jacob an apology for making fun of his ironing napkins and such. It's a must people. Sorry Jacob!

-Wiped down guest toilet.

-Pretended not to see the recently replaced bedskirt and shams, air drying, and not to notice that they've been dry for two days and need to be put in storage with the comforter. Like the part in Pee Wee's Big Adventure when the pet store catches on fire and Pee Wee keeps avoiding the snakes. Like that.

-Possibly stole (?) someone's song: Shut Up and Let Me Go, by the Ting Tings? My kids keep hearing it on a commercial so I looked it up. Wasn't trying to copy.

Question: Do you guys know that each night I respond to the comments you leave throughout the day? Do you read what I post? Do you care? (Be honest.) Would it be easier if I posted my responses here each day? The open feedback, with me, and with each other, really seems to help motivate, and push through the 4 o'clock sudden-onset dead-tiredness. Let me know what you think.

The tasks I will be cursing today:

-Ridding my troubled mind of said linens.

-Bleaching sinks.

-Folding all laundry.

-Possibly washing all windows (our entire house is windows, so, UGH!).

-Organizing the Junk Drawer From Hell while watching a much-anticipated movie, later. (I do not permit TV in the daytime, it makes me sick and enraged.)

-Something to show up Jacob, like maybe re-tile my bathroom, or hang swags of wildflowers braided together, flecked with sparkles. <3

-Dust for all eternity.

-Sweep laundry room, bathrooms, and back porch.

-Wash bath mats.

-Fill out some hideous paperwork online.

-Get seven blood draws for my surgery next week.

-Do some much-dreaded transcribing.

-Clean up my camera card. (This counts because--do you guys know this?--I LOATHE being on the computer)

Ready guys? Here's your outline. Modify as necessary, but do share your progress. I am seeing that this is key to our collective success. My objective is to envision a typical house, and assign you to various, deliberate areas, so that you never face an entire shit hole again. But feel free to improvise as you see fit, you're all doing an incredible job.


-Don't let those dishes nor that laundry sneak up on you. You're winning this battle, don't let your guard down. And by dishes I mean the pans on the stove, wipe down counters, sweep the floor, spot check. (Three minutes.)

-Wipe down bathroom sinks, toilets, I like to wash my bath mats often. If it's not too overwhelming, toss them in, and then sweep and Swiffer the bathrooms. Check the shower for pink patches. Uh oh. If they're on the liner, throw it in the wash. If it's on the floor or wall, go get your solvent of choice. No excuses.

-Check your bedroom. Bed made? Clothes hung up? Laundry banished? Run the vacuum, and while you're at it, vacuum the rest of the house. (Only three extra minutes.)

-Is it time to empty wastebaskets again? It's easiest to put the bathroom ones and such into the big kitchen one and haul it out as one. Do check, and possibly wipe down the cans if they need it. (They do.)

-Clear three surfaces.

-Wipe all door knobs. Swine Flu. Duh.

How's that? Get all this done and you're looking really good for a stress-free weekend. Get to it!


  1. I'm done for today (except the bed making which I will actually do because it's mom's first time here and she will get the tour). Having visitors lights a fire under my ass.

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  4. just got dressed at noon. in my robe i accomplished the following: 3 loads of laundry; sheets changed on 2 beds; bed made; unloaded dishwasher and put all clean dishes away. now that i am dressed, the trash is going out. not sure if i'll get to cleaning in the bathroom, but you have inspired me.
    **sorry for the deleted posts. seems i can't spell 'laundry' today**

  5. Ok, so my completed list includes:
    dishes, counters, all that jazz
    folded laundry
    washed both kids (it's as bad as washing a cat)
    cleaned the kids' room, unpacked a basket of clothes languishing in there
    vacuumed living, dining, hall, my room, kids' room
    tilexed the tub (unfortunately this caustic stuff is necessary as the fan in the bathroom has as much umph as a 1 year old blowing out their birthday candles)
    washed self and straightened hair as much as it can tolerate today
    picked up the baby's toys for the eleventeen hundredth time

    That's it biches! I'm out. Peace!

    p.s. yes, I read the comments

  6. I ironed my friggin socks off! and just so I don't have to face my iron again too long tomorrow, I've washed every towel I can get my hands on today (2 entire loads) and hung them out to dry.

    I also vaccumed again today, as I have to do this everyday since I am the proud owner of one deemed Cotton Ball Machine (aka my Siberian Husky) who is in the last of her shedding winter coat mode. Thankfully I dont have carpets downstairs....but sweeping is useless hence my Dyson and I have a love affair of vaccuming wooden floors. (Im not crazy, it has a hardfloor setting!)

    I also got to catch up on said Ghost Whisperer episodes while ironing, so non lazy TV scores an extra bonus point for my healthing eating scheme!

  7. Yes, yes and YES!!! I love reading the comments, both from you and the other fellow Moxlings!

    Yesterday I was at the grocery store for 2 plus hours. It took me 4 trips up and down the stairs to bring in the groceries and another 40 mins (between Idol performances) to get everything put away. I did however not only take a few of the creepy things out of my fridge but emptied the, ran the disposal and placed them in the dishwasher. Yay me!!!

    I'm starting to get a bit freaked out because I haven't done much around my house since Sun, I'm about to reintroduce cooking into my routine, starting tonight, and I have company coming this weekend... aaaarrrggghhh!

    And C, I really do hope you win the war with sleep sometime soon!

  8. I am off the wagon today. We've been ripping the garage apart, collecting garage sale fodder for this weekend. UGH!

    I'll try to jump back on tomorrow! Good luck fellow Moxlings!

  9. I read everyday and love the comments, but I can rarely post because it's a bit of a pain in the ass on my phone. I don't, however, get notifications about the comments that are posted after I read--so I'm sure sometimes I miss really good stuff. Hmmm.. now that I'm looking here, I see "subscribe to: post comments"... is that for the whole blog, or do I have to do that for each post? I'll try it out.

    So, today I:
    kept up with dishes/sink/counters/table
    swept and mopped all upstairs floors
    folded laundry & put it away
    started a load
    pruned (as in, cut the shit out of--down to stumps) 3 giant bushes in my backyard
    got some stuff posted on craigslist

    I hope sleep pays you a nice long visit, soon.

  10. Sometimes I read the comments, sometimes I don't. I prefer the open communication of answering questions within the blog. It seems like it would motivate you with a specific topic for the day and make everyone feel involved. Also, I like to know what other people struggle with. For example, I am more likely to get sidetracked by cleaning, cuz I often feel that I can't function until the world is clean, but sometimes homework needs to come first and sometimes I need to stop being a crazy control freak and take a day off....Yeah Right?!?!? LOL

  11. Had a long busy day...lots of errands. I was able to get some done around the house too, however.

    -I set up the guest room for our friend who arrives tomorrow [and by "set up" I mean followed my general rules for guest rooms, however modest or elaborate they might be (ours being on the modest side): a well made bed, high thread count sheets, down pillows, a few nicely boxed truffles on the pillow (I mean, you can never go wrong with a sees dark chocolate bordeaux), a small vase of flowers on the nightstand (we chose hydrangea), a few good books, and as an extra added touch, a beautiful frame with a lovely picture of you and your guest in it... all of which to me just say welcome. I think it's the few little touches here and there that make people feel really special.]


    -thorough scrub down of the guest bathroom

    -laundry/dishes (including hand washing five xxx-small chihuahua outfits)


    -bathed/blow dried the chihuahua (which, in my book, totally counts as cleaning...even though he is pretty easy going about it)

    -shopped for and preped several meals for this weekend (so that I could spend my time visiting and not slaving in the kitchen) and then cleaned up the mess I made doing so.

    -Emptied all of the trash/recycling/compost

    and still had time to be disappointed by Kris winning American Idol.

    I won't be cleaning much this weekend, but I am fine with that. A house is meant to be lived in and enjoyed with those you care about. I will pick up as we go along, and keep the dishes running through. And with everything clean and prepped and ready to go, I will be easy, breezy, and relaxed.

  12. Megan-I know it's a pain, but having guests is a true stroke of magic where motivation is concerned. Amazing job, I hope you can enjoy your visit, I know the heat's been bothering you. (Also, extra oitns ofr saying 'bitches.')



    Gail-There we go, lol. I know what your house looks like on a normal day, so with what you've done, I consider it fully clean. Your name's going in lady.

    Mesina-I'm beginning to see that I have been derelict in my appreciate for ironing (wrinkle-ish table runner--blech), so kudos to you mum. And I don't care what people say about a slippery slope, I am fully in favour of people having love affairs with their appliances. Just not the sharp one. You rock like New Kids on the Block. (Did I ever tell you I switched to Jon later?)

    Jennifer-OMG STAIRS??? Extra entry for you. Unloading bags after working all day two (read: 50) children? All while trying to glimpse Idol, only to have your soul crushed by that super cute gay guy losing? If you want to send me a list or pics or whatever of the areas you're worried about, please do so. Sometimes a fresh perspective can alleviate your burden.

    As for the sleep battle...I'll be under general anesthesia next week so hopefully I'll get a reboot. :)

    Manda-You are squarely on the wagon my dear. Getting ready for a garage sale, while ultimately cathartic, is a serious pain in the ass. I am the garage sale queen, and every summer, I rue the day I ever bought a single item. Good going! Be liberal about the things you cull from inside your home to put in the sell pile. If you haven't touched/used/noticed it in six months, it's out.

    Urban-I too am having a terrible time getting the comments to come to my inbox. It works just fine with my other blog, but I can't seem to make it stick. Ugh. Anyway, um, OMG you did a LOT! You're getting it about dishes being a code word for whole kitchen, but how it's totally manageable right? Mopping upstairs? Laundry? And you even did yard work? Total double entry!

    Karinda I totally hear you about the open forum, I'll see what happens as more questions come in, and consider answering comments on the post if people don't think that's too cluttered. Yes I too can never stop until the entire house is shining. One smudge can keep me from sitting down, even if I am deathly ill. The first step is admitting you have a problem, perhaps we can work on it together (wipes off monitor as she types).

    Jacob-Always you and your errands! I'm pretty much breathless from your description of your guest room, and now I'm having visions of you opening and B & B...Swept, mopped, laundry, DUSTED (grr...), washed the dog, dealt with the trash and was rewarded for all your labour by watching Adam get crushed by some no-name? It's Ruben Studdard all over again. (I've actually never seen American Idol.) I hope you relax and have a splendid visit with your friend. You deserve it.

  13. Thanks. And it was 'biches' on purpose. Apparently I was in a feisty mood. This morning I'm too tired to be feisty.