Friday, July 24, 2009

Ferocious Friday

Yesterday I woke up hella early to answer the call of dust, disorder, dishes, and duds, so my house wouldn't be jealous as I cleaned my friend Raven's new apartment. Meanwhile, I very clearly saw a broken glass in the sink, with only four large pieces, which I picked up brilliantly, yet still managed to cut my finger. My espresso maker only made half an espresso, I got two major emotional blows, as I dashed to and fro, swiping everything in sight en route to the shower. I also had to haul my Kirby vacuum to the car. Luckily I had wasted an hour creating a new playlist on my iPod.

Raven greeted me at the parking lot to pre-apologize for how disgusting the place was. I was 5% fretful. I walked up the stairs, thankful that it was five times longer than any staircase I've ever seen, considering I'd be hauling my Kirby up it.

It was totally anticlimactic. She moved in while her roommate is in China, and aside from furniture everywhere, it wasn't that bad. I had the kitchen all scrubbed down, including microwave, stove top, cupboards, fixtures, and the refrigerator. Now, I will confess to having a minor MI when Raven finally opened the previously forbidden freezer. In the three seconds before my eyeballs rolled out of their sockets, I was able to make out a tray of entrails, and a bowl of fish heads, as well as chicken and a few other more normalish-seeming, but unwrapped meat items. I held the bag open, eyes closed tight, holding my breath, and Raven did the reaching/dumping, eyes closed tight, holding her breath. Then she ran away and I bleached my entire body inside and out. I'm slightly concerned that the disposal of those things may have made accomplices in a crime? Blech.

She left to have a manicure, which is the exact opposite of scrubbing out a freezer that had been home to someone's body scant minutes ago. But I got the rest of the place done while she was gone and then embarrassingly fell asleep.

We had lunch, hatched some plans, as she is my most trusted operative, and I headed home.

Upon arriving home I folded three loads of laundry, meaning it's all done, washed all the dishes, no cuts this time, wiped down the counter, watched with pride as my kids their chores quite thoroughly, organized the computer desk, caught up on 28 emails, wiped down Todd's sink, oh and then I jumped up and swept/Swiffed and tossed the shower curtain liner in the washer.

So I felt pretty deserving of a little rendezvous with the couch, but alas, it was inhabited by many SpongeBob enthusiasts. (Um, is there suddenly a channel upon which it airs 24/7? Jesus.)

This may have been the most cleaning-centric week of my life, and it felt good to help my friends and still keep my own digs happy.

So what about you guys? I'm hearing lots about the heat, many headaches, general malaise, and some flimsy excuses, lol. What do we need to work on?


-Never turn your back on dishes and laundry.

-Fill one trash bag with trash. Broken toys, mateless shoes, expired coupons, broken hangers, some (gasp!) artwork? One bag, you guys can do it.

-For the artwork that is too cute to chuck, I hope everyone has something in the portfolio family. I posted what I use last month.

-Hang and/or fold scattered blankets, jackets, etc.

-Take honest inventory of your bathroom(s) and decide if Ajax or wipes will do the trick.

-Spend a few extra seconds, flex a few extra muscles, wiping your kitchen down, and wipe out your microwave. Tray goes in the dishwasher easily. Roof too.

-If you've got any energy left, or if you started at all, strip/make beds and vacuum.

There. All ready for the weekend. I'm guessing if I put it to a vote there would be overwhelming din in favour of an easy weekend rather than manic. But I'm in charge so we'll see.



  1. Bring it on!
    I've decided that despondency has turned into anger. Properly channeled, I'm fairly certain that I can beat my house (and packing nightmare) into submission.

    And I'll even throw in a shower for myself.

    Nothing like setting some goals, eh?

    Amy in Transition.

  2. Amy-That was one of my favourite posts of all time, lol. The current exchange rate for anger->moving is high, so let's make a deal: You be angry, but crank up some music. It will simmer you down a little and the kids won't hear you cussing. (Do you cuss?)

    Now the shower is my biggest struggle, so kudos for that!

    Great goals, post back with your box count!

    Meanwhile, today I have:

    -Made two beds.

    -Cleaned the kitchen.

    -Written chore lists and not enforced them.

    -Swept bathroom and laundry rooms.

    -Organized a trip to the park with friends.

    -Painted Reilly's toenails.

    -Folded SO MUCH LAUNDRY!

    -Hung my snooty delicates.

    -Spot vacuumed carpet with my hand.

    -Retrieved real vacuum from my car.

    -Ajaxed sink, tub, and toilet in front bathroom.

    Still need to:

    -Vacuum my car.

    -Make kids do chores before the park.

    -At LEAST figure out where the hell 8,000 board games go.

    -Really de-clutter dryer.

    -Tear the house down and rebuild one made entirely of white wood and chrome.

  3. So it goes that my sister and I have managed to keep the house somewhat functioning with really only her elbow grease. I get overwhelmed and then remember there are now 7 of us in the small space and really the rest of life makes the clutter irrelevant.

    I vote for doing stuff around the house this weekend so the real lounging/griping can take place next week when triple digits are expected. I of course won't have that luxury because I'll be out of town.

    This morning I washed a load of delicates and started another load before heading out to work. I also sorted through my clutter pile enough to find 2 seriously delinquent bills, now paid. That is about it for me but now that school is over I hope to get back into the groove.

  4. Jennifer-So you should have answered the 1-866 number! Good job getting delicates hung before work and tackling clutter-yea! Since you're the only one who spoke up, we'll roll up our sleeves tomorrow for sure!

    Good job guys.

    (And so and so, you were right about that person ripping off my idea, lol, sorry I didn't believe you!)