Friday, July 24, 2009
Yesterday I woke up hella early to answer the call of dust, disorder, dishes, and duds, so my house wouldn't be jealous as I cleaned my friend Raven's new apartment. Meanwhile, I very clearly saw a broken glass in the sink, with only four large pieces, which I picked up brilliantly, yet still managed to cut my finger. My espresso maker only made half an espresso, I got two major emotional blows, as I dashed to and fro, swiping everything in sight en route to the shower. I also had to haul my Kirby vacuum to the car. Luckily I had wasted an hour creating a new playlist on my iPod.
Raven greeted me at the parking lot to pre-apologize for how disgusting the place was. I was 5% fretful. I walked up the stairs, thankful that it was five times longer than any staircase I've ever seen, considering I'd be hauling my Kirby up it.
It was totally anticlimactic. She moved in while her roommate is in China, and aside from furniture everywhere, it wasn't that bad. I had the kitchen all scrubbed down, including microwave, stove top, cupboards, fixtures, and the refrigerator. Now, I will confess to having a minor MI when Raven finally opened the previously forbidden freezer. In the three seconds before my eyeballs rolled out of their sockets, I was able to make out a tray of entrails, and a bowl of fish heads, as well as chicken and a few other more normalish-seeming, but unwrapped meat items. I held the bag open, eyes closed tight, holding my breath, and Raven did the reaching/dumping, eyes closed tight, holding her breath. Then she ran away and I bleached my entire body inside and out. I'm slightly concerned that the disposal of those things may have made accomplices in a crime? Blech.
She left to have a manicure, which is the exact opposite of scrubbing out a freezer that had been home to someone's body scant minutes ago. But I got the rest of the place done while she was gone and then embarrassingly fell asleep.
We had lunch, hatched some plans, as she is my most trusted operative, and I headed home.
Upon arriving home I folded three loads of laundry, meaning it's all done, washed all the dishes, no cuts this time, wiped down the counter, watched with pride as my kids their chores quite thoroughly, organized the computer desk, caught up on 28 emails, wiped down Todd's sink, oh and then I jumped up and swept/Swiffed and tossed the shower curtain liner in the washer.
So I felt pretty deserving of a little rendezvous with the couch, but alas, it was inhabited by many SpongeBob enthusiasts. (Um, is there suddenly a channel upon which it airs 24/7? Jesus.)
This may have been the most cleaning-centric week of my life, and it felt good to help my friends and still keep my own digs happy.
So what about you guys? I'm hearing lots about the heat, many headaches, general malaise, and some flimsy excuses, lol. What do we need to work on?
-Never turn your back on dishes and laundry.
-Fill one trash bag with trash. Broken toys, mateless shoes, expired coupons, broken hangers, some (gasp!) artwork? One bag, you guys can do it.
-For the artwork that is too cute to chuck, I hope everyone has something in the portfolio family. I posted what I use last month.
-Hang and/or fold scattered blankets, jackets, etc.
-Take honest inventory of your bathroom(s) and decide if Ajax or wipes will do the trick.
-Spend a few extra seconds, flex a few extra muscles, wiping your kitchen down, and wipe out your microwave. Tray goes in the dishwasher easily. Roof too.
-If you've got any energy left, or if you started at all, strip/make beds and vacuum.
There. All ready for the weekend. I'm guessing if I put it to a vote there would be overwhelming din in favour of an easy weekend rather than manic. But I'm in charge so we'll see.