Saturday, August 8, 2009

Manic Mandate Saturday

You guys totally have to help me lull Karen into complacency and confidence about being able to keep up with this blog. It really isn't hard but for her sake I'd like to reiterate that the purpose is not to turn you into Cinderellys scrubbing for 24 hours a day.

The motto is, "A little each day keeps the shit hole away." And the key is maintenance. If you're going upstairs, take something with you. If you cross the kitchen straighten your hand towels and swipe down a counter. You'd be surprised at how a few extra seconds adds up to a happier home. Our basics are dishes and laundry because those are what drive my Moxlings to suicide, so those challenges are daily. Karen, your house is incredibly clean so this will be a cinch for you, like a first year Spanish test.

But Saturdays are manic and I am a machine I don't expect anyone to keep up with me. Still, I share my list because I want people to know what is possible, and to thank god they don't have OCD.

Today my list is as follows (and yes I'm good for it):

Wait. This doesn't mean put the boys in boarding school and buy a uniform. It's just ideas and that I want credit. :)


-Wash Mesina's laundry for fuck sake, mail it back to her, and enter the witness protection program, damn. (Does anyone's daughters have days of the week underwear? Well, Reilly has them, and the socks, and when I was a kid there were no Sunday ones, 'cause god would be offended, but now there are because he's glad to get whomever he gets these days I guess. Even as militant as I am about the laundry, I have to bust my ass to keep the days of the week clean and ready.)

-Gather every dish in your house and put it in the left side of the sink. Wash now or later, but do it.

-Clean your stove top.

-Pay a visit to your crispers and take no prisoners.

-Clear off the tops of those refrigerators. It is not a display hutch.

-Check floors.

-Dust with whatever implements will not make Karinda hate me. :)

-Check for smudges on windows, tvs, mirrors.

-Set your timers for ten minutes and go into Obama mode.


-Get up and take your kids through the car wash, ice cream, etc.

-Relish your efforts.

Karen--Music is vital. Right now Pink is where it's at. I want to make a Pink/sink rhyme but that would be Seussical and lame.

Tune back in for comments, these ladies will make your guts explode (on the inside, where they won't make a mess).

Ready set go!

(Pink: Sober)


  1. This is my final post this week, so you won't be seeing me until next sunday or so. (bet you are all grateful!)
    So, today I am doing no cleaning and off to collect Maurice's parents from the boat in an hour or so. We should be having a good time :)
    See you all next week! Have a good one x

  2. Yep, typical Saturday wasteland. Bitches!

    I accomplished my list and then some, caught up with some fine fine women, cleaned away some stress and then wound my way through Salem's own Bermuda Triangle to attend Evelin's party which was ridiculously fun. Going back tomorrow, if I can remember how the hell to get there, and cleaning her after-party-tastrophe. Someone spilled a bottle of pop on the counter. I will not sleep tonight.

  3. Mostly made it through the list. The refrigerator is on my "to do" list for tomorrow. Keagan and I worked outside today on weed whacking until I ran out of line and then he had a meltdown in the car on the way home from Monmouth Hardware. Ah, naptime. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
    P.S. - What do I have to do to get some Pink?