Thursday, August 20, 2009

This is IT Thursday!


Stop.

Clear your lists.

Sit your ass down.

Forget everything I've said. (But just for today, let's not be extreme.)

Grab your coffee.

Now implement whatever inner-woo-woo goddessy visualization, prayer to the baby Jesus, get out your crystals, hymnals, lucky rabbit's foot, whatever it takes to get Karinda's baby out because I'm not gonna lie, it's stressing me out. I'm starting to believe it's possible that the baby isn't going to come, and I don't want to be putting bad mojo out there when she clearly needs some good fucking mojo, and so I feel guilty. Also, I'm having sympathy exhaustion and sometimes feel like I might just blurt out "What the fuck is wrong with you?" (In love of course.)

Okay so since clearly it's about me, we need to get this baby out. She's got the tub, Baby Daddy is nearby, Tami is like some lumberjack or something and can totally improvise like MacGuyver until the midwife makes that seven and a half hour drive to Dayton, her house is clean, and today's date is divisible by five. So focus on Karinda, calm, comfortable, probably with Tami saying something semi-inappropriate in the background, kids in awe (or getting jelly all over the kitchen), a babbling brook on cd, lots of reassurance, and finally, holding a beautiful ten year old in her arms.

Seriously, today I want that whole bizarre tidal ebb and flow female unity crap to work and get this baby out.

Go Karinda go! Go Karinda go! Go Karinda go! Please Karinda please!

13 comments:

  1. I opened today's to see if there was anything I wanted to tackle before trying to sleep. Instead I saw a wonderful call for support for a mama waiting to meet her little one for the first time. Come out, little baby! We can't wait to meet you! (Go Karinda, go!)

    I love how you casually point out that today's date is divisible by five, Chey. Very smooth.

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  2. The past few nights my toddler has slept in his own bed or with sister (no accidents!) in an effort for me to get more rest and hopefully my body would take it as a sign to go into labor.
    No such luck.
    Last night he slept with me again. Remember my freshly laundered bedding? Yeah, that is why I had him wrapped in double diapers...just in case.
    I *still* woke up in sheets covered in pee. Argh.
    Therefore, so far this morning I have:

    ~Gotten toddler cleaned up, dressed, ready for childcare.
    ~Beds stripped
    ~Laundry started
    ~Breakfast made

    Will report more later..........

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  3. I had a dream last night about your baby, Karinda. It's time. ♥

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  4. "Tiny baby. . . .We're all so excited to meet you!"

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  5. macguyver? really? ROFL

    in defense of her toddler, i did attempt to keep him at my house last night. around ten, though, he told me very clearly that he wanted to go back to mama. so i just kept her 12 yo instead. i did TRY, though.

    i won't say anything more, but i think she's coming today. we'll see!

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  6. Susannah-What kind of devotee checks to see if there's anything she wants to do? But yeah, it was smooth right?

    Karinda-I can't believe you aren't awash in tears at my extremely uncharacteristic feminist gesture, or sending Tami to slice me with her thresher. But, in spite of your uber-practical post, I will attempt to stretch Riok peeing on you into a metaphor about the tidal wave of love and support surrounding (OMG PUKE!)... just have the baby.

    Sam-Aw. I love the juxtaposition of your orders and a heart.

    Dawna-Um, it isn't going to be tiny, it's going to ask for the keys to the car.

    Mac-Um, yeah really. Well maybe if I met you I could conjure up a more fitting alter-ego, and perhaps a celebrity look-alike as well. This needs to happen.

    We've got to buckle down mamas, she's still posting, lol.

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  7. Also:

    ~Did dishes
    ~3 Loads Laundry
    ~Made Bed
    ~Went out and got remaining groceries & HANGERS!
    ~Hung all the clothes that needed to be hung in children's rooms. We were getting desperately short on hangers.
    ~1/2 the school supplies purchased

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  8. Karinda-You have left me with no choice: "What the fuck is wrong with you???" How the hell can you stand 14 feet back from the sink to even do dishes? But um, epic win on the hangers (all white RIGHT?), and I confess to feeling giddy about school supplies too. You're a hella-rad, lovely, hyper-productive freak of nature. You sabotaged my plot to will that baby out, and were nonchalantly perusing notebooks. Pretty smooth lady, pretty smooth.

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  9. I was crazy productive today-I make me proud!

    -I vacuumed the entire house
    -dishes, countertops, and floor of kitchen are shiny!
    -vacuumed the fireplace
    -folded laundry
    -cared for two "extra" children
    -general decluttering

    Gee, you'd think I was expecting guests!

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  10. I'll totally admit to NOT being nonchalant about perusing notebooks! I was standing around having contractions while reading the list to my 12 year old to send her up and down the isle and squatting to the bottom shelf!

    Also, Tami drove...just in case we needed to make a quick get-away.

    I'm not a total superhero! LOL

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  11. Ok, yesterday was a blurr since Maurice came home and stayed home... was feeling a little bleck.

    So today I came with a million armed excuses and...what's this?! I missed supporting Karinda in having the baby?! Contractions?! MacGuyver?! Divisible by 5?! Holy. Shit.

    Ok, so today I'm going to cheer Karinda on, just in case she hasn't given birth yet and I will start getting out the big guns (aka incense) and start praying to the labour Goddess (cos it's totally NOT a god..duh).

    Karinda, all my love thrown your way for a safe and swift labour and a beautiful healthy little one. ♥♥♥

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  12. Dawna-VACUUMED YOUR FIREPLACE??? You are dangerously close to being banned for life you show off! <3

    Karinda-You have carte blanche to not be nonchalant about anything ever again, which is how long that baby is going to stay inside there! Quick get-aways are my favourite, and you ARE a superhero. You are sane and radiant and take amazing pictures. I want to call you a bitch but no, you're an effing superhero. And a damned good sport! (Trampolining being the sport naturally.)

    Mesina-Yeah, a blur of hot nekkid sex, and who could blame either of you? I'll save my broken cheated-on heart for an email. Where did you get a million armed excuses? Costco? Yeah you missed our welcome party, which Karinda nonchalantly dismissed, pfft.

    Contractions?! MacGuyver?! Divisible by 5?! Holy. Shit. I am madly in love with you.

    Fine Karinda, back to cleaning tomorrow!

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  13. Chey - you misunderstand. I was simply seeing if there was anything I felt like I could tackle at 2am.

    And I thought this posted at about 4am this morning, but apparently I fell asleep (!) while it attempted to post and failed.

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