Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Trying Again on Tuesday

Dude, I went to visit Debe at like 9:00pm, and of course like fell asleep on her arm until 3-something am, at which point I raced home to post this blog, only to see that cleaning was nobody's priority today. If you're not gonna clean for you, could you at least clean for me? Geez.

Mondays can be brutal, and this weather...well...I know this is verboten but falls sucks. Sorry, I know we're all supposed to be knitting socks and peeing ourselves over squashes and pumpkin spice lattes but it's just a prelude to the black sideways sleet and malaise of winter, so I'm pretty much like yeah fuck it. But, there are intermittent good days that are not charcoal grey, and those the days on which we must capitalize cleaning-wise. Or we can just sick Tavy on you all, and she can chase you saying "Get up and cleeeeaaaaan! Sweeeeeeep! Get up!" Bethany texted me today and asked me to collect my spawn. I crashed off the road.

So in honour of the fact that we've been graced with a house guest for almost a week, and the impending arrival of my aunt as well, can we please go full-throttle?

I've already:

-Cleaned the laundry room as I came in.

-Done the dishes.

-Wiped down the kitchen.

-Answered, not read mind you, but answered six emails.

-Ate a lemon cucumber. May eat more.

-Lay out the freshly laundered throw rug.


After blinking for a couple hours, I need to:

-Clean kitchen more thoroughly.

-Attack clutter as if it was harbouring WMD.

-Clean surfaces to give the illusion of space.

-Make sure the kids room is still sparkling from when I narrowly opted to clean it rather than kill myself last week.

-Casually make a pile of Sonny's stuff and put it on his even bigger pile in the bedroom. (No, really, it's so fine. I love it.)

-Make kids' chore lists.

-Go through the car wash (vacuumed car yesterday).

-Spiff up living room.

-Clear dining table.

-Give both bathrooms a medium once-over.

-Sweep/Swiff all floors.

-Sweep porch, admire the uniformity of the totes I bought to put Todd's eyesore man shit in a few days ago, and grin at my genius. Even though they're blue. It's a long story.

-Rake up Todd's birthday balloon carcasses while Reilly isn't looking and recycle them. The kids threw him a Spongebob themed party and like, the balloons are not cute dead.

-Crazy little thing called lessons.


-Basics. No excuses. Come on, it's not math!

-Do any three things from my list, especially clean my laundry room.

That's all. Gotta start somewhere. Move it!


  1. I'm on bedrest atm, and my laundry basket shows it. :/

  2. Because Tavy doesn't understand the phrase, "Mama sick!" I have a clean kitchen. VERY clean. I cleared the dining room table and cleared all surfaces in the kitchen. Also did a load of laundry. Will now go find my bed and hope that a stack of books will hold the toddler demon until it's time to change the laundry. Also, DH is so impressed with my recent spate of cleaning that he cleaned his office. Go him.

  3. Katie-Ah, sorry to hear that. At least have someone take it away so you don't have to look it in the eye. I hope whatever ails you is swift to mend.

    Bethany-Jesus Christ she is my child. I reread the "Please collect your spawn" text at 4am on the freeway and was thisclose to crashing, ha ha ha! So way to go you, your rest will feel better surrounded by order. Can you trap T in a laundry hamper or something? Points for motivating/guilting Kevin into cleaning his office, that's a biggie.

    I have been labouring under the illusion that having one neat house guest is quadrupling the dust, shaving a cool 500 sq. ft. off the interior, and about this I am certain: He uses hella towels. I don't know why. His hair is long but not like Rapunzel or something. Or maybe we just don't reuse towels because what if we get Sonny's instead of each others'? OMG I don't know but I folded 31 towels yesterday and he had been here three days. Also, we don't have 31 towels.

    Other than that, I've made a point to keep the kitchen extra shiny, having Quinn basically vacuum every ten minutes, Reilly is entertaining my favourite aunt at my mom's so I can run away with Debe, and I did a load of delicates today. Oh I also forced Quinn to simulate a manic dusting spree before he could jet off with the six hundred men who descended this morning, all friends of Todd's and Sonny's from Maui, and all driving white Jeeps. (Todd and I each drive white Jeeps because I will only allow white vehicles, isn't that shitty?) Anyway it was rad, like a convention, and then they were gone and I cranked up P!NK and scrubba-dub-dubbed. But OMG if Sonny's pile gets any bigger I'm going to call animal control. Okay so that's what I'm up to. I detailed my car's interior today while waiting, need to do kitchen floors, and a frantic 20 minute run-through.