Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Tiny Tuesday


My house is so clean that one crooked, errant Post-It note felt like a wrecking ball had paid us a visit. No one has been home really, since the fam made camp at my mom's, and yet I notice the lamest shit. I will try to spare you that blessed talent.

So I have a minimum number of things to tackle. The hard part was r-i-p-p-i-n-g Quinn and Reilly away tonight so they and their cousins, Oren and Wyatt, could all sleep and shower and decompress for five seconds before they wear us ragged tomorrow.

So today looks like this:


-Sleep more than three hours. LOL!

-Coffee.

-Keep laundry sorters empty.

-Scan kids' rooms before turning them loose into family reunion anarchy.

-SHOWERS!

-Check Gilbert House info while excusing myself on the grounds that I hate that place, while simultaneously burning hell of music for Emilie while burning old family movies from the 50's for 6,000 relatives.

-All before an 11am appt.

-Deposit children, pre-fed, as they tend to forget to eat.

-Vacuum my car without using my neck and running through the car wash.

-Stop home to change into comfy, preemptive elastic-waisted clothing before a serious dinner. Brilliant.

-Dust.

-Make sure sinks are empty.

-Clean my purse. It needs to drop 50 lbs. For real. My back is like at a slope and crying.

Finito.

Y'ALL:

- To borrow and bastardize a Scripture: "Never let the sun set on your laundry nor dishes."

-Grab your preferred all-purpose spray and go on a search and rescue team scouting out surfaces who are waiting for you. Office, kitchen, bathrooms, etc.

-Sweep entryway, linoleum, bathrooms.

-Windex all sliding doors in side and out.

-Make sure refrigerator is wiped down, nothing up top unless space is an utmost premium.

-Pick up 20 things.

-Be glad you're not at the Gilbert House. More importantly, pray I don't end up there.

-Give your refrigerator/foodstuffs a mini makeover. You know there's a spill or expired cottage cheese. Baby steps.

Relax, or whatever your antithetical equivalent of relaxation is. Local Moxlings, come meet my brother. Folks came in droves today, and he was charming, and HIS HAIR WAS SHORT!!! He often wears it long to spite me. Come on over for a beverage and a mixed bag of esoteric subjects.

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