Saturday, February 13, 2010


Well we've had our fun with house fires, not to mention the miscellaneous host of other blows to the heart and mind. Wow.

Note: Today someone dear to us is missing, and I am praying to any power listening for this person's safe return.

We just checked out of the Marriott and am so eager to scrape what feels in my mind like algae off of every surface, I can barely sit still to type it all out. Dashing back and forth to grab movies, food that needed to be used (we were there almost three weeks), clothing, mail, etc., somehow reduced our house to a disaster site of which I couldn't even bear to post pictures. Things scattered for miles across the counter, blankets (grrr...), and the oddest of ends. In fact, so stuffed to the gills is my mental list today, I will have to post by room.

I sat on the couch last night and suddenly it was 7am. Quinn and Reilly were asleep one inch away from me. Even with my heart heavy with worry, I had to smile that my shaving young son, and feisty independent daughter slept thisclose to their mama the minute we got home. Thankful doesn't being to describe it.

So as I rubbed my eyes and surveyed the aftermath, er, house, I gathered a few things I know I'll be putting to use today, and I thought I'd share.

First and foremost, nothing gets done without this puppy:

Speaking of puppies, Moxie does not love Bella. Just sayin.'

Next, these go without saying. Yes, Todd bought Clorox because he was at Fred Meyer. Quinn was pissed. That's my boy:

For all your de-linting needs:

Precious though they are, my slumbering babes aren't getting off the hook. They have serious work to do. I usually use Post-Its, but I bought a white board because a) I am a white board fetishist, and b) There's a hell of a lot to be done. Bah. They do exceedingly well with lists, so I'm letting them rest up and show me the money!

Always handy when vacuuming couch cushions, floors, and de-linting:

Halfway point snack. I could eat these until my tongue bleeds. Thank god they're $234752490752035 per package:


I have already:

-Made my (bed?)

-Made coffee

-Gotten all of the laundry into the dryer, with the heap-in-waiting already tipsy...

-Rounded up supplies.

-Charged iPod and phone, which I am hoping will not ring. :(

-Re-stocked the Kleenex which was apparently raided by stuffy-nosed aliens. I keep Kleenex on pretty much every surface and each box had like one left. Hmmm...

-Sorted and stacked a friend's birthday gift with valentines I will wrap later.

-Noticed 39846 things I need to add to my list. Go coffee go!!!

In Moxie order:


-Load/run the dishwasher.

-Bleach sink.

-Wipe down the counters, arranging/putting away extraneous, mind-crushing crap.

-Wipe appliances, including the top of the refrigerator.

-Remove random candles, whose charm wore off three hundred days ago, from said refrigerator top.

-De-clutter coupons, pictures, other cop-out items stuck on refrigerator. I hate that! Perhaps I will have to remove all but two magnets...yes!!!

-Scrub the garbage can upon emptying.

-Get behind garbage, where the dust villages live, along with some errant boxes of soy milk (squatters), and scrub the refrigerator grill while my old bones are down there.

-Put the kids' crap into piles on the counter to be removed.

-Sort through mail and other slowing-me-down type things so I can wipe down the big counter.

-Wash window, inside and out.

-Wipe ceiling, light fixture, trim, etc. Hooray for six-foot-long arms!


-Ajax the porcelain until it cries. Yank all towels, replace with fresh ones, shake out bath mats, sweep/Swiffer the floors, scrub sinks, tub/showers, toilets, baseboards, re-stock t.p. and/or hand soap as needed, Windex mirror, tidy up Todd's front bathroom "office" of receipts, business cards, other tidbits. Curse tiny house. Be grateful for said tiny house.

***TRICK*** I used to wash our bath mats on delicate and wait eight days for them to dry, but since I bought the hand held Dirt Devil, Quinn has discovered how amazingly well it works on the mats. Yea!

-Check to see if vinyl liner needs to run through the washer. (Note: I recently learned while cleaning a friend's house that if you wash an 88 cent liner it will shred like fettucini, but if you wash a $1.79 liner, you're good as gold. Wtf?)


-Once all laundry has completed its course, toss linen sorters into wash and use OxiClean, hang dry.

-Pull naked sorter out and sweep under it.

-Ditto shoe rack, which Reilly will be sorting.

-Run lint roller over recently-washed mats, after shaking them out and sweeping/Swiffering under everything.

-Cry for mercy at the 709 reusable grocery bags which are being used for every conceivable purpose, such as returning one plate to someone, holding the kids' outgrown clothes, awaiting homes, stuffed animals, dirty clothes, clean clothes, valentines, cleaning supplies always on-hand in my car, as lots of people have been needing a hand lately. :) Also magazines no one wants to part with nor deal with, laundered items whose homes the kids aren't certain about, you get it. I hate these bags. I forget to use them at the store, hence our outbreak, gads. If anyone wants to take any off my hands, out of my laundry room, PLEASE let me know.

(How appropriate that Cry Baby is playing!)

-Scream. Cry. Repeat.


-Wait. Still crying. This has become the mother ship of all of Todd's mini offices of which I speak and openly lament. (The front bathroom counter, the top of the microwave, his closet, omg omg omg.) Recently, in an effort to de-clutter (bless him) and churn up some extra cash flow (BLESS his heart), he has begun selling things on eBay again. We used to do this constantly years ago, but I gave up when I went back to school five days a week and began doing some school work with the kids. I abhor the tedium, but Todd is very methodical and can clean, photograph, and list things in spite of eBay's ever-changing format without going insane, so more power to him. I really appreciate his enterprising nature and his patience, but Jeebus I hate this part of the house. Currently, in addition to his three amplifiers, shrouded in painfully mismatched beach towels, are six Pampers boxes of ancient magazines, which sell for a pretty penny, guitar guts atop the magazines, four boxes of Hot wheels he strategically selected back in '03, and is selling for roughly $25.00 apiece now. Not too shabby, except the sight of the boxes might kill me. Also, before my dad died a few years ago, he bequeathed a bunch of random shit to me (no he would not be offended by this description). He to put it...a white collar hoarder? I don't know. This man, dear god. Had so many things, mostly little and/or old, and/or southwestern (gasp!), and/or gross, etc. When he died i had a huge garage sale and made quite a lot, as his taste, while not appealing to me, save for a few items, was quite elite, and I sort of made a killing. I sold his collection of Swarovski crystal ornaments for almost $600, and yes, I kept a lot of things too. One of which is some ancient gun he got as a kid. My kids really aren't into that type of thing, so I gave Todd the okay to list it. So it's sitting here, cluttering everything up and kind of making me sad about my dad, to whom every single match book was precious. But I mean, was I really supposed to hang 7,000 ceramic clown masks on my wall when I am a huge caulrophobe? Eesh.

Sorry for the worst tangent ever.

-Organize the wasteland on the computer desk, wipe down EVERYTHING, check all blank disks, sort pics on the desktop, tidy up cabinet next to computer, have kids dust the cords/baseboards.

-Wipe bay windowsill.

-Dust/wipe all hanging pictures/trim.

-Vacuum ("Oh Quiiiiiiiin!")

-Get some iTunes shit done if there's time and space later.

-Hang the white board where it can be seen and obeyed by all!

-Gather Netflix to be mailed.


-Scream, if I have any voice left after cleaning the computer area.

-Make them deal with emptying trash, picking up clothes, which they are usually excellent about, making beds, general tidying. Hooray for being 10 and 11!


-Change sheets, make bed.

-Dust EVERYTHING twice.

-Kiss my Obama calendar.

-Spiff up dual vanity, wipe it down. Possibly sort some christmas stuff?

-Look at closet and see if I feel inspired or faint.


-Clear the table, which, as every home schooling family knows, home schooling families don't have dining room tables. But seriously, separate lessons from Todd's accounting station, from the two puzzles, from LEGOS, enough to wipe it all down and make room to make valentines with the kids later.

-Wipe down/organize school/game/hasty-don't-know-where-to-put-this shelf.

-Group pencils and pens.

-Wipe it all down baby!

This is *my* list for today, but we mustn't forget, I have to clean like this, lest I burst into tears, imagining scabies and tape worms making their way through everything.

If you've read this far and aren't blind, I challenge you to do ***ANY*** of the 10 things I listed. Even the 10 easiest. C'mon, you know you can do it!

For those curious as to what I scrawled onto my white board, here ya go. Took five seconds, and I may add more:


  1. I wanna white boooooarrrd!!! * whines*

    Glad you're back! Although my cleaning escapades are short and limited since I'm all on crutches and surgical belts. Dewd. Not sexy. But only 8 more weeks to go!!! xx

  2. I LOVE your blog! What do I do to become a Moxling? :)